I know I haven’t put up a blog in a while, but part of that I can blame on my recent nose surgery. I had a deviated septum operated on and I made a video about it that you can watch it here.
Now, I know that’s not the best excuse for not writing anything, because if I can make a video I can damn sure write a little bit here and there, but to be honest with you I’ve been enjoying the down time
One of the nicest things about having surgery, (besides getting whatever thing fixed that they operated on) is that you’re expected to relax to recover. Now normally for me, every time I just sit around doing nothing I feel like a fucking loser.
I never feel like I’ve earned enough downtime to just veg out for days in front of the tube or just sit around reading books all day, but that’s what I’ve been doing for the past week, and I fucking love it.
I didn’t feel guilty for a second. I’m really going to have to learn how to do that under normal conditions. I’ve tried, but I always find myself thinking of what I should be doing and how I’m wasting my time.
Now the obvious solution to that is to just get everything done that needs to be done so that I can relax, but I obsess, and I never feel like I ever really get to that place.
Even on vacation I sit around thinking about how much shit I’m going to get done once I get back home.
Anyway, point is, I’m inspired, rested, recharged and back to the keyboard. Tomorrow I go in to the doctors office to get all the blood clots, scabs and snot sucked out of my nose, (more video to come) and then this weekend it’s off to Vegas for the biggest fucking UFC card in the history of the sport.
It’s UFC 100, and it’s going to be off the charts insane. Brock Lesnar vs Frank Mir for the main event, GSP vs Thiago Alves for the welterweight crown, and a shitload of other awesome fights. All of my best friends are going to be down there for the weekend, and we’re going to suck every once of fun out of that rotten, fucked up town for two days. That, by the way, is the perfect amount of time to stay in Vegas. Two days is MORE than enough. Anything more, and you wish you were home taking penicillin and looking into yoga classes. Anything less and you feel like you’re missing out. Two days – trust me.
Redban is going to be there as well, so we’re going to have plenty of great video coverage of the weekend for you fucking savages. The great Russell Peters is hanging with us, along with Ari Shaffir, and the funniest man to ever walk the face of the earth, Joey Diaz.
I can’t wait!
One thing for sure, if you see me at the airport this weekend, or checking into the hotel, I WILL be rocking a fanny pack. People keep asking me if I’m serious about this whole, “bringing back the fanny pack” quest that I’ve talked about, and the answer is hell motherfucking YES.
I don’t wanna hear anything about how gay it looks, I KNOW it looks gay, but you know what? It’s convenient, and I like wearing it, and it would be far more pathetic of me to not wear something I like because I was worried about the way it looks than it would be to ROCK that goofy piece of forbidden fashion with a big fat smile on my face. I really, truly don’t give a fuck. It makes traveling through the airport metal detector way easier, and I think it’s funny when people look at me wearing it like I’ve got a plate of moist puppy shit strapped to my waist. I know there are a lot of people out there reading this that enjoy the convenience of the fanny pack, but they’re afraid of the social repercussions. Well, fear no more, my timid friends. It’s about time we brought that bitch back. I’m so committed to this venture that I’ve teamed up with www.ronebreak.com and we’re putting together a contest. Whoever can come up with a list of the 10 best things that you can keep in a fanny pack will get a free one autographed by yours truly. Go to the site to read all about the details.
My Spike TV comedy special “Talking Monkeys in Space” aired again tonight, and thank you very much for all the kind words I’ve received about it in emails and from twitter. I really appreciate it.
I’ll have some more shit up for you guys before the weekend, and I’ll be performing with Joey Diaz tomorrow night at the Brea improv just to knock the dust off the new material and kick it with one of my best friends on the planet. Come on out if you’re in the neighborhood.
Lol dont worry about having to constantly update ur shit dude…the forums on your site are fucked up enough to keep everyone entranced for a minute or two.
Having had surgery on my shoulder due to MMA related bullshit, i have to say i admire your courage in the blind trust of others. I wish i could say the same..something about me being ‘dead’ for even like 45 minutes just freaks me the fuck out. Granted it being for my shoulder and VITAL to my future of enjoyment of life inside the local gym, i was still scared shitless.
Hope your nose swells down to somewhere exactly between where it is now and to the late Michael Jackson’s. Let us know how it holds up at 10th planet! Cant wait to see you @ cap city again. Never laughed so hard in my fucking life (or seen so much pot passed freely to you in a bag from a local firefighter). Enjoy the trip brother, and glad you took the time to take a great picture with me and my best buddy. LIVE IT UP! C you on tv @ ufc muthafuckin 100! lol
-Kyle Cox
Right on Joe. I’m glad you found some time to get your nose repaired. You’ll live longer now because while you sleep, you’ll have more oxygen to the brain. I probably also need to get some work done to my nose, but it’s not that bad really. I crashed my bike and skateboard a few times when I was a kid, and I got punched a few times too. If my breathing gets too bad, I use those nasal strips that stick to the outside of the nose. Anyways, that’s it. Stay happy and I’m also a fan of the fanny pack. I wear it all the time in Russia. Peace
I had a red fanny pack when I was 12 years old, and took it with me to Six Flags when I went for the first time. I loaded it up with Snickers Bars to keep me going through the days festivities. Midday, when I finally got around to eating the first one, I noticed they had all melted in the fanny pack, and it looked like I had crapped in my fanny….. pack. Of course at the age of 12, a badly melted candy bar didn’t stop me from eating it
Anyways. Joe, I am going to submit my top 10 list, and I think a have a few on the list I think you’d appreciate. I am a big fan. I am not one to reach out to celebrities, but every new Joe Rogan clip I know is either going to make me think, laugh, or both.
Thanks!
- NIBIRU a.k.a. Anticult
Hmmm while you’re at it read, “Waiting for Godot” by Samuel Beckett. It’s play, but a quick read that will inevitably help you with your feeling of “nothingness.”
Peace, Love, and Pixie Sticks
Chris Kumma
man joe me and a co worker were talking about how fanny packs need to make a comeback for the past 2 months. but since we live in tucson we figured @ swap meets they’d sell made with red white and green colors with a soccer dude on there like a jordan logo but for mexicans. they’d buy that shit….
I know cuz I am one!!