Always a good time doing Tom’s show. I’ll be on today from 5 until probably around 6, PST. www.blowmeuptom.com
Until then, check out this video of me on the Fernando and Greg show on 92.7 FM in San Francisco.
They’re two really cool, openly gay radio DJs, and doing their show is always a fucking blast.
Vegas, tomorrow. It’s a spontaneous trip from LA and I am SO excited. See you then!
I have important information about the DMT world please contact me joe rogan at jaalaidaalai@yahoo.com. Sweet dreams
Sorry about the wording, I meant Joe Rogan please contact me, I am not Joe rogan
Really dude?
——————————————————————————–
Tough portal to travel through to send a brother an email.
I mean the click thrus are brutal. I am honestly so sick and tired of giving out fake email addresses….if some dude from Dateline shows up in my kitchen and starts reading transcripts I am going to have to reference my Screen Name Cheat Card just to figure out if I clicked the wrong hyperlink.
Props to you, Senior MR Rogan. I think (technical) fighting and comedy are both ways to avoid conflict. I just watched your Showtime piece and I think it is the least contrived thing I have laughed at all year. Honest and funny. I am a Christian and I am the first to admit that a lot of what I believe has to do with the fact that no one has come up with a better explanation yet.
I woke my daughter up to listen to your Noah bit. Life makes no friggin’ sense dude!
Life is crazy……so crazy in fact that I decided to pay some D-Bag that went to high school with my brother in law a wage of room and board to tape up my nose, strap a friggin’ snorkel to my head, move to China with me, and chase me up and down multiple flights of stairs if he promises to yell at me in English while testing my blood for LACTIC ACID (how about regular acid) to prepare me for a streetfight.
I have trained MMA and know how to check a kick and stuff a takedown and place double underhooks and shoot a double and transition to an arm and stay in the pocket…..cuz’ that sh$t might come in handy!!
If I am ever attacked by a caveman who hangs out with a referee.
I did find out one thing while “training” in the Art of MMA (you can’t “dabble in MMA like you can in “porn”): The reason I am not a professional fighter is the same reason I am not a professional musician, artist, political blogger, or comic: I don’t like being punched in the face, rejected, or punched in the face while being rejected.
But my father in law HAS SHOT A BEAR!!
And that to me seems absolutely friggin nuts. I wouldn’t own a gun unless the race war was in full effect…but I spend literally HOURS of my WEEK practicing UNARMED COMBAT just incase I get carjacked by Tarzan in the presence of Big John McCarthy? Seems a little crazy. Not as crazy as the universe that is currently hurtling over my head, but pretty CRAZY!
So nice bit Rogan..I actually called a dear friend of mine from back in the Day and told him to watch your Showtime special. Well done. Honest. Funny as Hell.
PS: He smokes a soul defeating quantity of weed and that has always been a point of contention between us. Thanks for clearing that up
Motherfuck…
I have sleep apnea, … and my oral rape began like 7 years ago.. I snored. FUCK YEAH!
….since i was 10! (41 now) and my snoring was so fuckin bad.. I have been kicked out into the hallways at hotels, by family, friends.. because not only did I saw logs, I had the volume of a chainsaw to boot! SO when I started my current shitty job.. it’s not bad, but not great.. but it pays bills… such as life.. I got the the health insurance shit and decided to address it. SO the doc said I had a deviated septum.. ok.. and that my tonsils were way fuckin big.
SO let the oral rape begin..
I got my tonsils ripped out of my head at 34 years old, and boy did that suck the big wazoo, and they also did the nasal clean out.. so all is cool.
I love hospitals… I work in one I should know!
the FESTIVITIES begin….
Well, the day started at 5am, surgery at 1pm, hadn’t eaten shit. (I mean food) and the surgery got delayed so I ended up going in at 3pm. SO now it was like 7pm when they finally did wheel me in the room
like Fine, and then like the retards some can be, ask if I am hungry?
Hmmm, let’s see haven’t eaten in 24 hours, I am tired, been orally raped..
Let’s rephrase that question… That’s like eating Good Mexican food and then asking a few hours later if I have gas…
They bring the shit, sherbet, jello and hot tea, … HOT FUCKIN TEA.. WHY THE FUCK WOULD I WANT HOT FUCKIN TEA… I finally work my way thru the supplements.. I don’t call the shit they brought called food EITHER.
They decided I need 100% humidty with the oxygen… so I was masked up…
Well in Buffalo new york in winter.. it gets cold..wait no… Buffalo can get FUCKIN cold. SO I get the window, and the room is cool, and I have the oxygen hooked up to humidifier set at 100% humidity. GREAT.
Science question for the day.
What happens to water vapor when it hits cooler temperatures… DOES CONDENSE ring a fuckin bell? Yup, the hose is 6 ft long and what does it do, come out of the machine hangs down like 2 feet (maybe 2 1/2) and back up to my fuckin yap.
More festivities, so I nod off, 30 mins later, I wake up, glug glug glug..
Fuckin great, the water condensed at the bottom of the loop in the tubing.. and my ait supply basically drastically reduced. SO I take off the mask.. so I can breathe, and a nurse comes to my need.. (not THAT need) says I need to be wearing the oxygen mask and I look pale.
PALE… I look PALE..
Gee, I just got orally raped. I can’t breathe and I am PALE… WTF?!?!?!?!?
SO she empties the water and I back to dreamland I go.
30 mins later….
glug glug glug… WTF!?!?!?! I take of the mask ring the nurse, she comes in and empties the hose. and back to dreamland.
ALL FUCKIN NIGHT…
The next day, as it gets time for me to go, they see me nodding in and out of consciousness because of LACK of sleep. and Say it is not safe for me to drive… NO SHIT.
That’s my story and I am stickin to it!
tortech716
The spontaneous trip to Vegas turned out to be the best trip I’ve ever had in Sin City. Fuck yeah…
PS – Quote that reminded me of you – Alan Watts talking about DMT, “Load universe into cannon. Aim at brain. Fire.” If I wasn’t curious before….
Shit dude, I bet this sleep apnea shit is my problem too. I woke up alone in an Australian hostel when 2 hot (and not hairy) German girls bailed cause of my snoring!! You rock Joe, I’m getting this shit looked at. BTW, I know you like looking up fucked up shit so if you don’t know about it already check out http://www.inhumanity.com……Also I am proud to say you inspired me to finally watch 2girls1cup and I stomached the whole thing (laughed my ass off to be honest)
Good post man. I appreciate how you keep it real…even with the exciting and fast paced topic of sleep apnea.
Can’t wait for the next Joe show! I’m still hoping comedy central pulls their head out of their asses on Ned.
joe we need chill and smoke weed. You have the best life in the world.Traveling around the world teling jokes.